People, mainly women, seem to think that there is much security in having a partner that acknowledges the two as a couple, in a relationship, for others to see. The source of this action is usually fostered by insecurities from either one or both parties and comforts them in the sense that they believe their partner is solely theirs, not attracted to others, and has a big 'HANDS OFF' sign. However, a title or "boyfriend," "girlfriend," or "in a relationship with" on facebook is worth about as much as the html code is that displays it... absolutely nothing. Generally speaking, in my experience, humans are a sexually charged and mentally one-track minded when it comes to many things. If there is something we see that we want, 9 times out of 10, measures will be taken to obtain that thing. Do not be fooled, a relationship status on Facebook or the declaration of one's love constantly on social networking sites will NOT keep individuals from attempting to have contact with your significant other or yourself. People lack self-respect and pride, it just is what it is. The key is to be comfortable enough with yourself and have trust so that when situations occur, whether one knows of it or not, one doesn't have to worry because they know what their bond consist of.
At the same time, people can be deceiving. For me, it's just easiest to assume that everyone is guilty until proven innocent. Not to constantly blame someone or walk on eggshells, but dispense your trust accordingly. It's important to me that someone proves that they are worth my time and efforts, and if I don't see it pretty quickly, they are cut off. No need to continue to invest emotions.
Take this information and apply it to your situation. If you need Facebook or public display to validate your relationship, maybe you should evaluate why you are doing that and see if there are any insecurities that you have or any that your partner has played a role in establishing... B/c in the end, there's nothing special about having a title in a game that others have already won.
Let's see, where do I start... First off, I agree, and I'm glad a woman voiced this ;-) (so men don't have to catch hell for thinking such thoughts) A relationship should be a natural progression between two people, and the point at which it comfortably peaks is where the definition lies. So the titles of "girlfriend/boyfriend" statuses of "taken/in a relationship" or mentions of your significant other seem to draw more attention than shy people away. I personally prefer to keep my private life, exactly that...private, because it's the only way to maintain a relationship comfortably. What "we" share can't be special if "everybody" knows about it all of the time. With that said, it does seem to be true that people feel more secure from the fact that their facebook status still says "in a relationship w/ whoever" than they actually are in their situation. I just recently witnessed some puppy love couple go from "oh baby you're my everything" one day to "I can't stand that ole stankin ass bitch" the next... 9/10 it's never what it seems to be.
ReplyDelete